


No Mercy for Monsters

by AttacknoFiction



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Compliant, Manga Spoilers, Moral Ambiguity, Multi, Time Travel, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-11-22 08:50:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11376774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AttacknoFiction/pseuds/AttacknoFiction
Summary: Marco wakes up three months before the Attack on Trost and tries to change the course of history.Marco knows there are two possibilities: first – he's somehow gone back in time and Reiner, Bertholdt and probably Annie are titans, and second – he's gone insane. He's inclined to believe the latter, but he remembers all too clearly the feeling of Reiner's hand covering his mouth, he remembers Annie taking off his gear, he remembers the titan's teeth. There isn't a night he doesn't dream of those teeth.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story includes scenes depicting teenagers being killed and tortured. You've been warned.

His own strangled scream wakes up Marco. He blindly reaches for his face, but except tears, there's nothing out of place. He takes a shuddering breath and tries to stop crying, but it's hard to do when a minute ago he was being eaten by a titan and now he's in his cot, with Jean sleeping next to him. 

"Are you alright?" He hears a voice. 

Reiner. Of course it's Reiner. He's the only one who woke up, even though he's three cots away from Marco. Jean is still snoring peacefully. 

"What's wrong, Marco?" Reiner asks. 

Marco suddenly hates the genuine concern in his voice. He hasn't completely woken up from that dream yet. But was it a dream? He glances towards Reiner. Next to him Bertholdt is awake too. He's leaning on the wall and staring at Marco with big, unblinking eyes. Marco wants to throw up. 

"Nightmare?" Reiner says sympathetically. He and Bertholdt are prone to an occasional nightmare too. Marco has always thought it's because of what they've seen in their village, but now... 

"Ugh, shut up, I wanna sleep," Connie mumbles, trying to kick in the general direction of the voices, but hitting Jean instead. 

That finally wakes him up. 

"What's going on?" He says sleepily. 

"Marco had a nightmare," Reiner says. 

"You did?" Jean says concerned. 

Marco wipes away his tears and squeezes Jean's hand. 

"Ouch," Jean says, then quieter, "It's fine now." 

"Shut the fuck up, Jean, people are trying to sleep," comes Eren's voice. 

"You shut up, Eren, I wasn't even the one talking!" 

Connie kicks Jean again. Marco smiles and lies back down. Jean keeps arguing with Eren, but doesn't let go of Marco's hand. Everything is back to normal. It was a dream, just a dream. No Colossal Titan, no breached Wall Rose, no eaten comrades, no betrayal. It's fine now. 

"I'm just glad in three months you'll run to the Military Police like a coward and I won't have to see your stupid horse face every day," Eren shouts. 

Marco's eyes snap open. Three months? They have already had their disbanding ceremony. He couldn't have dreamed those three months. He remembers the events up until the titan attack on Trost. But if it wasn't a dream, then how... His head is spinning. No, it's not possible. It was a dream. It has to be. 

Eren and Jean have long stopped arguing. Jean has gone back to sleep, his fingers still entangled with Marco's. The silence is interrupted only by snores and Franz talking in his sleep. Marco looks around. Everyone seems asleep, only Bertholdt is still sitting with his back to the wall, hugging his knees and staring into distance.

^^^

Marco knows there are two possibilities: first – he's somehow gone back in time and Reiner, Bertholdt and probably Annie are titans, and second – he's gone insane. He's inclined to believe the latter, but he remembers all too clearly the feeling of Reiner's hand covering his mouth, he remembers Annie taking off his gear, he remembers the titan's teeth. There isn't a night he doesn't dream of those teeth.

Even though he keeps telling himself it was all a nightmare, he still keeps an eye on the trio. However, the only suspicious thing he notices is that Bertholdt stares at Annie a little too much. 

"Should I be jealous?" Jean says, sitting next to Marco with his plate. 

"What?" 

"You keep ogling Bertholdt and Reiner. Should I be jealous?" 

"Don't be stupid." 

"What?" Jean grumbles, "They're both pretty good-looking and strong." He wraps an arm around Marco's waist. "I bet Reiner could crush a man with one hand. Like this." He suddenly pulls Marco to him, grinning deviously. 

Marco shudders and rolls his shoulders. "Please don't say things like that again," he says. 

"Marco, what's wrong?" Jean says. 

Marco leans his forehead on Jean's shoulder. "I think I'm going mad," he whispers. 

"You? You're the least mad person I know," Jean says. 

"Is it a good thing?" Marco says, looking up. 

Jean smiles gently, which is a new look on him. "The best," he says and smiles again. "You're just stressed, Marco. But you'll see, we'll be fine, we'll both graduate in the top ten and join the Military Police." 

"The Military Police, yes," Marco says, "We'll be able to serve the king." 

Jean rolls his eyes. "Whatever you say, goody two-shoes." 

Marco grins and tilting his head up, puts a chaste kiss on Jean's jaw. 

"Seriously, guys," Connie says from behind, startling both of them, "You're worse than Franz and Hanna."

^^^

Marco successfully convinces himself that everything he remembers was a nightmare. But when the Colossal Titan breaks the Wall, he realizes how wrong he was. He watches in horror how everything goes according to the script: people die, Annie asks Reiner what to do now, Eren transforms into a titan.

But there's something that's not going to happen. Marco sure as hell is not going close to Reiner and Bertholdt. He's going to survive this and then he'll find a way to expose them. This time he won't be so stupid. 

Eren is almost near the gate when he realizes that he can't see Jean anywhere. 

"No," he whispers, his heart suddenly beating twice as fast. 

Forgetting everything, he flies through the buildings to the place where he first died. It's too late. Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie are standing on a roof, horrified, as a titan brings Jean to its mouth. 

"You bastards!" Marco shouts, "Help him! Please help him!" 

Jean's ear-piercing scream rings in the air, as the titan starts chewing on him. Tears streaming down his face, Marco lunges at the titan, even though he knows Jean is already gone. 

The last thing he sees is the titan's palm crushing him on a wall.


	2. Chapter 2

"No!" He screams and jolts up in his cot, "Jean!" 

"Hey, what's wrong? Marco, what's wrong?" 

"Jean," Marco says, wrapping his arms around the other boy and sobbing into his shoulder. 

"Nightmare?" Reiner says sympathetically. 

Marco's breath hitches in his throat. 

"Ugh, shut up, I wanna sleep," Connie says, kicking Jean. 

Jean moves to retaliate, but Marco is holding him too tightly. 

"Hey, you'll strangle me," Jean says. "Marco? What's going on?" He adds quietly. 

Marco slowly loosens his grip and lies back down. Jean starts stroking his hair until Marco's breathing evens out. 

"Better now?" Jean whispers. 

"Yeah," Marco says, "Much better." 

Considering he just saw Jean get eaten and was crushed under the palm of a titan, he's pretty good. He needs a plan now. He has to find a way to expose the traitors. He has to stop them before it's too late.

^^^

He dedicates every free minute of his day to watching the trio. Jean is confused and hurt by the lack of attention, but Marco consoles himself with the thought that he's doing it for both of them, for the whole mankind. 

He watches them during the training, at dinner, he even wakes up at night just to check on them. He notices that Reiner sometimes just stops doing whatever he's doing and stares into space, then his face twists as if in pain. He notices how Bertholdt always looks on edge, even when he and Reiner are alone. He notices how Annie looks at them with something more than her usual disinterest. 

Apart from it, they are the same as they've always been. Annie is still aloof and distant, Bertholdt is still quiet, but friendly, and Reiner still acts like he's everyone's big brother. Within a day he gives Sasha half of his breakfast, helps out Armin in training and saves Thomas when his 3DMG malfunctions. 

If Marco hadn't been watching the three of them carefully, he wouldn't have noticed how Bertholdt's frown gets deeper and how he and Annie exchange worried glances. That day after dinner Marco follows the two guys to the forest near the base. He hides behind a tree, as Reiner sits down next to the river and Bertholdt stands in front of him. 

"What's this about, Bertholdt?" Reiner asks confused. 

"It's about you," Bertholdt says, "What are you doing, Reiner?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"He means you're acting like an idiot, pretending to be such an upstanding guy and all," Annie says, suddenly appearing from behind a tree. 

"Annie?" Reiner says, "What are you doing here?" 

"Bertholdt dragged me here," Annie shrugs, "He thinks I can talk some sense into your thick head." 

Reiner looks at Bertholdt helplessly. Marco almost rolls his eyes, even he has a hunch what those two are talking about. 

"Reiner, please, snap out of it!" Bertholdt cries. Marco has never seen him so anxious. "Do you remember who we are? We're warriors, we have a mission. We can't fail." 

Now Marco is the confused one, while Reiner's face crumbles in understanding. 

"I know," he says softly, "I remember." 

"You've gotten too close to them," Bertholdt says, "You realize that many of them will die when our titans break the wall, don't you?" 

"I know," Reiner repeats, "I have to keep up the act, though, don't I? I can't raise suspicion." 

"That reliable guy act isn't a good look on you," Annie says, "No matter how much you act like Marcel, you'll never be Marcel." 

Reiner looks like he's been slapped. "Shut up, Annie," he hisses. 

Annie just smirks and shrugs. 

"Just try to focus on the mission, Reiner," Bertholdt says quietly. 

"I'm focused," Reiner says harshly, standing up, "Let's go back, it's late." 

He immediately starts walking towards the base. Marco's heart leaps to his throat. He tries to get away as quickly as possible, but in his haste he breaks a twig. In the silent evening it sounds like an explosion. 

"There's someone here," Annie says, alarmed. 

His cover blown, Marco starts running, but he's no match for Reiner, who reaches him and tackles him to the ground. 

"Marco," he says, "You shouldn't be here." 

"Reiner..." Bertholdt starts. 

Marco starts kicking and trashing in his arms, but Reiner just tightens his hold. 

"I can't let you go," he tells Marco. 

Marco tries to scream, but Reiner closes his mouth with his hand. 

"What's going on here?" Annie says, approaching. 

"He heard us talking. We can't let him live," Reiner says. 

"Are you kidding me?" Annie cries, "What're we going to do now?" 

"You'll help me deal with him," Reiner says. 

"And how am I supposed to do that?" 

"We have to..." Reiner's voice breaks. "We have to drag him to the river and... drown him. Help me." 

Marco starts trashing with a newfound strength. He doesn't want to die like that. Just not like that. 

"Why me?" Annie says tearfully, "Get Bertholdt do it for you." 

"No, it has to be you," Reiner growls, "What, have you started to feel compassion for this evil race? If you say that you and your father..." 

"Annie," Marco cries, pushing Reiner's hand away from his mouth, "Please don't." 

But he already knows what's going to happen. With tears in her eyes, Annie grabs him and helps Reiner carry him to the river. 

"Why, why are you doing this?" Marco sobs, "We could just talk, why would you do this?" 

No one answers him. They just keep dragging him to the bank. 

"Maybe we could first, uh, hit him with a stone or something," Bertholdt mumbles, "So he wouldn't..." 

"If they find him, they'll see the wound," Reiner says, "We just have to..." 

There's hesitation in his voice, but he still pushes Marco's head underwater. 

"Annie, help me," he says when Marco starts struggling. 

Annie, crying openly, obeys. 

"Good job," Reiner says, "This is what makes us warriors." 

That's the last thing Marco hears before his lungs fill with water.


	3. Chapter 3

He wakes up coughing and struggling to breathe. 

"Are you alright?" Reiner asks. 

Marco barely manages to run to the open window to throw up. His whole body is shaking and he jumps out of his skin when someone puts a hand on his shoulder. 

"Nightmare?" Reiner says sympathetically. 

Marco is overcome with another wave of nausea, but this time he keeps it down. "Y-yeah," he says, squirming away from Reiner's hand, "Please, don't..." 

"Oh, yeah, sure," Reiner says, pulling his hand away, "You want to talk about it?" 

_I did, you were the ones who didn't,_ Marco thinks, but he just shakes his head. 

"Fine," Reiner says, "You should go back to bed or you'll fall asleep during training." 

"Ugh, shut up, I wanna sleep," Connie says and kicks Jean. 

"What's going on?" Jean mumbles. 

"Nothing," Marco says before Reiner can explain. He crawls next to Jean again. "Go back to sleep," he whispers. 

"Mmm," Jean smiles and promptly falls asleep again. 

Marco lies next to him with his eyes open until the sun rises.

^^^

Marco has a new plan: to stay away from the trio. It makes him feel incredibly guilty - knowing a secret that can potentially end humanity and not disclosing it equals treason - but he doesn't fancy getting killed once again. 

When Trost is attacked, he doesn't even come close to the place where he has already died twice, and doesn't let Jean approach it either. 

Eren closes the gate, humanity takes Trost back, Marco, Jean and Annie join the Military Police. Being so close to Annie makes Marco a little nervous, but at least Reiner and Bertholdt are not there. Let the Survey Corps deal with them, Marco and Jean will lead a peaceful life inside Wall Sina, away from death and destruction. 

The Military Police is not what Marco imagined. It's full of corrupt, lazy, vile people who laugh at Marco's ideals. Few are actually there to follow their dreams, most of them just want to have a comfortable life. 

Jean seems disappointed too, but more in himself than in the others. He has changed a lot after Trost. Sometimes Marco feels like he regrets not joining the Survey Corps. 

Annie is as distant and cold as ever. She's slacking off, but it's fine by Marco. As long as she's not killing anyone, she can do whatever she wants. 

The morning they are told they have to accompany the Survey Corps, Marco's gut twists unpleasantly. But there's no reason to worry, it's extremely unlikely Reiner and Bertholdt are with the convoy. There's probably just Eren and the top brass. 

But the fear has settled deep inside him and the fact that Annie disappears somewhere along the way doesn't help it. 

"Jean," he says quietly, "Please be careful." 

"What are you so worried about?" Jean says, "We just have to accompany that suicidal blockhead." 

"Just... be alert and careful, please," Marco says, "Trust me." 

"Alright," Jean says, caressing Marco's hand with the tips of his fingers. 

The explosion catches them by surprise. Marco's instincts are screaming at him not to approach, but duty wins over. The others, including Jean, follow him. 

He recognizes Annie as soon as he sees her. In her titan form she's running to the Wall with Eren following close behind, while the MPs are watching in shock. 

"Do not engage, we'll take care of her," someone from the Survey Corps orders. 

But it doesn't stop Jean. 

"She's going to get away," he shouts, jumping from roof to roof. 

"Jean, wait!" Marco cries desperately, "Jean, please don't." 

Annie suddenly turns back and swats away the soldiers attacking her. Rocks and pieces of roof fly in the air together with people. Before Marco can see what happened to Jean, a boulderstone hits him in the face.


	4. Chapter 4

He doesn't scream this time waking up, just gasps and jolts up. 

"Are you alright?" Reiner asks. 

Marco wants to punch him. "Yeah," he says hoarsely. 

"Nightmare?" Reiner says sympathetically. 

"Yeah, Reiner, but I'm fine, go back to sleep." 

Thankfully the other boy complies, and Marco lies back down. He spends the night looking at Jean's peaceful face and devising a plan.

^^^

In the end he's forced to wait until Trost. There's just no way someone would believe him if he said that people can turn into titans. They have to see Eren first. He and Jean both survive the attack and Marco feels hopeful. This time he knows what to do.

First of all, he needs an ally. Armin is an ideal option, he's smart, he's open-minded and he's seen Eren's transformation with his own eyes. Even so, it's hard to convince him that his friends are titans. 

"Are you sure about that, Marco?" He asks again. 

"I told you, Armin, I heard it with my own ears. They were talking about _their titans_ , about _the hole they made in the Wall_. You saw Eren's titan. Who's to say he's the only one with that ability?" 

"Intelligent titans," Armin says slowly, "The Colossal Titan knew exactly how to strike and the Armored directed for the gates. If we assume that you're right and two of them are the Colossal and Armored titans, then what about the third one? I don't recall any other intelligent titans." 

"Reiner and Bertholdt, they have to be the Colossal and Armored titans," Marco says, "Annie is probably some titan we haven't seen before." 

"We have to tell someone about this," Armin says, "I'm going to the capital soon to testify for Eren, I'll try to talk to the Commander of the Survey Corps about this. Meanwhile you keep an eye on them." 

Marco spends his time counting the days until Armin's return. Will the Commander believe him and Armin? What will he do? Will they be able to capture them? What will they do if they capture them? 

He hates thinking about the last question. He knows he shouldn't feel sorry for them, for the people who've killed him so many times, but he can't help it when he sees Reiner laughing with Connie, when he sees Bertholdt shaking his head affectionately at Jean's crude jokes, when he sees Annie throwing down one opponent after another. 

Armin and Mikasa return with the good news that the Survey Corps has gotten the custody of Eren, but more importantly they return with Commander Erwin Smith and a number of high-ranking Survey Corps members. That night Armin wakes him up and drags him out of the dormitory. 

"Commander Erwin wants to see you," he whispers, "I told him about your suspicions..." 

"They are not suspicions," Marco says irritated. 

"Sorry, I still find it hard to believe that Annie, Reiner and Bertholdt might be our enemies," Armin says. 

He leads Marco to a room where they meet Commander Erwin, Commander Pixis, the crazy lady with glasses and a blond guy who sniffs them. 

"Marco Bott, right?" Erwin says. 

"Yes sir," Marco answers, straightening his back. 

"Armin told me you have information regarding three members of the 104th. If it turns out to be true, it might be essential to the survival of humanity." 

"It's true, sir, I swear," Marco says, "Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie are titans, one of them is the Colossal Titan." 

"What exactly did you hear, Marco?" Erwin says. 

"I heard Reiner say that he'll have to do something with his titan and Bertholdt answered that Eren will plug the hole they made." 

Erwin nods. "What about Annie Leonhardt?" He asks with a glint in his blue eyes. 

"She-she... was there too. She told them to shut up and be careful," Marco makes up on spot. 

"What if they were joking?" 

"It didn't look like they were joking, sir." 

"You two have spent three years with them. Were they close to each other?" 

"Bertholdt and Reiner are best friends," Armin says, "But Annie... She's not close to anyone in particular." 

"Erwin, you mean to say that there are four humans capable of turning into titans in the 104th?" Pixis speaks finally. 

"Commander Pixis, if I may," says the woman. Hange Zoe, Marco remembers her name, she's been experimenting on the captured titans. "After receiving the information, we have requested the documentation regarding the three suspects," she continues, "As it turns out, Reiner Braun, Bertholdt Hoover and Annie Leonhardt come from the same region." 

"Erwin," the blond man says, "Is it enough to accuse them of treason? I'll sniff them at the first chance I get, but even then we won't have enough evidence." 

Erwin stays silent for a minute. "It's not enough to accuse them, Miche," he says, "But it's enough to suspect. We have to make sure. We have to set a trap and make them reveal themselves." 

"If one of them is the Colossal Titan, how are we going to deal with him if he reveals himself?" Pixis says. 

"We'll lure them to an enclosed space," Hange says, "To a cave or someplace underground. It will be easier to capture them there. We'll make sure they can't transform, but we have to be ready for our plan to fail. According to the latest reports, the Colossal Titan is slow, but it can disappear quickly. It won't be easy to do if there's nowhere to go." 

"So the Colossal Titan, huh?" Pixis says, "And the kid thinks that the other one is the Armored Titan. To defeat that one will be even harder. In Shiganshina our cannons did nothing to it, I suppose swords won't work either." 

"Then we don't have a right to make a mistake," Erwin says, "We have to cut him down first, so he can't transform. But for that we need to know which one of them is the Armored Titan." 

"Commander," Armin says timidly, "Marco mentioned Reiner's words about doing something with his titan. I wonder if we can assume it meant he hadn't done something with his titan yet. But the Colossal Titan had appeared in Trost, so if the assumption is true, then Reiner is the Armored Titan and Bertholdt is the Colossal Titan." 

"Too many assumptions for my taste," Miche grumbles, "And how are we going to stop them from transforming?" 

"Eren's transformation is triggered by self-injury," Hange says, "I think it's safe to assume the same is true for the others. I hope by the time we carry out the operation, we will have found out more about Eren's abilities, but I think in case of more serious injuries transforming will be harder." 

"So on the basis of our assumptions we're going to put at risk the lives of three good soldiers who might be innocent," Pixis says. 

"That's a risk we have to take," Erwin says. 

Pixis nods. "So be it. We'll start working on the details of the operation." 

"The 104th is still under the Garrison's command, Commander Pixis," Erwin says, "You'll order them to investigate something underground and we'll set the traps there. Meanwhile we'll keep an eye on them and try to find out more." 

"Do try to capture them, Erwin," Hange says, "Imagine how much more we can learn if we get them alive." 

Her eyes gleam and Marco has to suppress a shudder running down his spine. 

"You can go," Erwin tells Marco and Armin, "Thank you, you've been a great help to humanity. Be sure to act natural and not to raise suspicion." 

"Yessir," Marco and Armin say together.

^^^

Someone kills Sawney and Bean, the titans Hange's been experimenting on, a couple of days before the operation. Hange is inconsolable at first, but when Erwin informs her that the culprit is most likely Annie Leonhardt, her sorrow turns into a maniacal determination.

"She and her friends will take Sawney and Bean's place soon," she says dreamily. 

The operation date is set the day before they're supposed to choose their military factions. A group composed of experienced Garrison soldiers and the newbies from the 104th, led by Rico Brzenska, goes to investigate the supposed criminal nest in a cave. 

Besides the trio, also Marco, Armin and Mikasa were chosen to participate in the operation. Mikasa was informed of the suspicions and included in the squad. Jean was pretty upset that he hadn't been chosen, but Marco calmed him down with a kiss and a promise to make up for it. _If I get out of here alive,_ he didn't say. 

The best of the Survey Corps are lying in ambush. Commander Erwin himself is leading them, supported by Levi's, Miche's and Hange's squads. Their experience combined with Mikasa's strength and Armin's intelligence makes Marco believe that they will be successful this time. 

"Isn't this a job for the Military Police?" Annie says when they're at the entrance of the cave. 

"We are to follow the Commander's order, understood?" Rico says, "Almost all of you are in the top ten of your year, so you have a chance to join the Military Police. Consider this a test." 

"Yeah, Annie," Reiner says with a grin, "Aren't you going to join the MPs? A good soldier follows the orders without questions." 

Annie looks disgruntled, but reluctantly enters the cave. Bertholdt glances at Reiner with worry. Seems like Reiner is in one of his weird moods again. It's good news, he won't realize what's going on until it's too late. 

The operation begins when they are pretty far into the cave. Following Rico's signal, the group quietly disperses, leaving the three titans isolated. 

As expected, Reiner is caught by surprise, not understanding why the Survey Corps is attacking them. Before he can blink, his limbs are cut off and he's pinned to the ground with a few swords going through him. Berthold has been busy watching Reiner carefully, so he's also unprepared, but he still has time to bring his hand to his mouth and he would have bitten it too if not for Captain Levi slashing him from head to toe. Annie, though, Annie's been suspicious from the beginning and even though she's injured, she still manages to transform into the female looking titan Marco saw a life ago. 

Her form isn't as huge as last time, but she's still fast and she runs towards the exit, approaching the hollow where Marco and Armin are hiding. They don't have their ODM gear, because they didn't want to give the enemies an advantage, but now Marco wishes they had them. 

_This is it,_ he thinks, closing his eyes, when Annie swats away another soldier. How stupid it was to assume that this time everything will be fine. He's tried and tried, but nothing happens the way he wants it to. Maybe it's not supposed to happen that way. 

"I'm sorry, Jean," he whispers. 

But death doesn't come. Mikasa, having taken the ODM gear of one of the fallen, attacks Annie and with Captain Levi and Miche joining her, in a matter of minutes Annie's brought down to her knees. 

Mikasa slashes open her titan's nape. "Annie," she says, "Get out."

^^^

Hange's assumption turned out to be correct. All three of them were hurt too badly to transform or even to stay conscious. Marco was actually afraid Bertholdt wouldn't make it, but looks like he's underestimated their healing ability.

It's been almost a month since their capture and only the people who took part in the operation know about it. Marco thinks it's wrong to hide such a thing from the government, but after witnessing the state of the Military Police in his previous life, he's not as scandalized as he could have been. 

He told Jean, though, and Eren knows too, of course. Both didn't believe it at first and demanded to see the trio. They were granted their wish and both came back shocked, angry and sad. Jean then told Marco that he’s choosing the Survey Corps and Marco had no choice but to follow him. 

Now they're grimly guarding the door of the cell, where Levi is interrogating Bertholdt. 

They're in the same abandoned castle that Eren has apparently been living in with the Levi squad. Reiner, Annie and Bertholdt are usually kept chained in a small cell in the basement. They have to be kept in weakened state, so they are barely given any food or water, their limbs are regularly chopped off and from time to time they cut open their chests or stomachs. 

Levi and Hange have a torture routine. Every day they take one of them to another cell. Levi starts working first, they give the prisoner a couple of hours of respite, then Hange comes in. After resting for another couple of hours Levi and Hange both get to work. In the evening they take the prisoner back to the common cell only to start the same thing next morning with another one. 

They were staying strong at first. In a way they are still staying strong, because they haven’t revealed a lot, only that Bertholdt is in fact the Colossal Titan and Reiner is the Armored Titan and that they’ve come from outside, which the Survey Corps had already figured out. But in the beginning they barely made a sound during the interrogations. 

“They've been trained to withstand torture, but everyone breaks sooner or later,” Captain Levi said on the second day. 

He was right. Now Marco hears the screams everywhere, even when there is no actual screaming. Commander Erwin wants guards in front of the cell doors all the time and Marco and Jean’s shift sometimes coincides with the torture sessions. 

Hange-time is the worst. Levi treats them like the enemies and traitors they are, but Hange considers this one fun experiment and finds new elaborate ways to test their limits. Levi’s sessions usually include just screaming, while when Hange’s working, they scream, sob and plead. Sometimes just seeing Hange provokes a hysterical reaction. 

Marco’s most hated part comes whenever Reiner loses his grip on reality. First they thought it was an act, but apparently at times he forgets who he is and considers himself a simple soldier from the 104th. During those moments Marco wants to march in and kick some sense into him, remind him who he is and what he’s done. 

As Bertholdt's screams get louder and louder, Jean's frown gets deeper and deeper. Marco knows better than to speak to him about it. Jean's been in a horrible mood ever since he found out who his friends really are. He is still mad at Marco for not telling him sooner and for participating in such a dangerous operation without him. Sometimes Marco thinks Jean's mad at him also for allowing this to happen, but he tries to convince himself that it's ridiculous. Marco can't do anything about it and even if he could, why would he? Don't Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie deserve what's being done to them? They are monsters, this is what monsters get. 

Lost in his thoughts, Marco doesn't even notice that Bertholdt has stopped screaming until Captain Levi comes out. 

"Hange and I have been summoned to the capital with Erwin," he says, the blood evaporating from his hands and face, "We'll be gone for a few days. Be very careful with them." 

"Yes sir," Jean and Marco say. 

Levi leaves them without another word. The boys keep guard silently until it's impossible to pretend they can't hear Bertholdt's faint sobs from behind the door. Marco wishes there was a way to make him shut up. Jean fidgets nervously for a while, then says: "He's probably waiting for Hange to come and torture him. You think we should tell him she's gone?" 

_Maybe then he would keep quiet._ "I think we should," Marco says. 

Jean takes the torch and opens the door. Bertholdt whimpers when they enter and tries to crawl back. "No," he moans, "No." 

"It's us," Jean says. 

Bertholdt blinks as his eyes adjust to the light. He looks better today than he usually does after the sessions. He's got an ear, both of his eyes and almost half of his teeth. Levi was probably in a hurry. 

"Guys?" he says, "Where-where is..." 

"They've been summoned," Jean says, "They'll be gone for a couple of days." 

Bertholdt's shoulders sag in relief for a moment, then he tenses again. 

"Are you guys... Are you here instead of Hange?" He croaks. 

"What?" Marco says and then he understands, "No! Of course not. We're not going to-to... We're just here as guards." 

"Oh. Good." His face twists in what Marco thinks is an attempt to smile. 

Something ugly rears its head inside Marco's chest. He wants to tell him to stop, wants to tell him he has no right to smile like he's just Bertholdt, their friend, and not the Colossal Titan, a monster who's brought death and suffering to so many people. He wants to wipe that pathetic imitation of a smile right off his face. 

He turns back before he can do it. Jean follows him. 

"Wait, wait," Bertholdt calls, "Are you guys going to leave me here? Won't you please take me back to Annie and Reiner?" 

"There was no such order," Marco says. 

"You'll just have to stay here until Hange and Levi come back," Jean says. 

"I don't like it here," Bertholdt says in a small voice. 

That's not surprising. The torture cell is dark, small and stuffy. It smells of blood and sweat. Marco's been here just for a few minutes, but he's already struggling to breathe. Not that the other cell is much better, but they're together there. Hange keeps them together, thinking they might overhear something from their conversations. But so far they've just heard them scream in sleep and Reiner's confused ramblings from time to time. If Marco were a little more cruel, he'd suggest separating them. He's sure they would break. Maybe not Annie, but Reiner and Bertholdt would. 

Their shift is coming to its end when Bertholdt starts sobbing again. Jean closes his ears with his hands. "What now?" He murmurs. 

"Jean!" Bertholdt cries suddenly, "Marco! Somebody, please..." 

Jean and Marco look at each other. 

"Please," Bertholdt shouts desperately, "Guys, help me..." 

With a sigh, Jean unlocks the door and they enter. 

"Jean, Marco, please, please take me out of here," Bertholdt begs, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe. Please take me to Annie and Reiner." 

"We can't," Marco says, "I told you, Bertholdt, no one has given us an order." 

"Please," Bertholdt sobs, "I'll do anything. I'll tell you everything, all our secrets. Just let me see Annie and Reiner, I'm going to die if you don't, I can't breathe." 

"What do we do?" Jean whispers to Marco, "Look at him, he's hyperventilating, what if he really dies?" 

"Can they even die like this?" Marco says. 

"Who knows? But we can't-can't let him die, right?" 

Jean's made up his mind, Marco realizes, he's waiting for Marco's approval. 

"Bertholdt," he says, "We'll take you out, but just for a few minutes. Then we have to bring you back here." 

"Yes, yes, fine, just... I have to-I have to..." 

Marco and Jean take him out of his shackles. His arms and legs have almost grown back, though they're missing skin. Usually Levi or Hange cut them off. Marco knows they're supposed to do it now, but neither he, nor Jean can bring themselves to even consider it. Besides, in half an hour the other shift comes, let them do it. 

Bertholdt is still sobbing inconsolably when they bring him to the cell. The guards of this cell are from the Garrison and, considering Marco's reputation as the guy who identified the titans, it's easy to convince them to let Bertholdt in for just a few moments. 

"Bertholdt?" Reiner cries as soon as they enter, "You bastards, what have you done to him?" 

"I'm fine," Bertholdt says, shaking, as Marco and Jean shackle him to the wall, "Reiner... Annie...." 

Reiner's eyes widen in shock. 

"Bert..." He whispers. 

Annie's staring at Bertholdt too, but she doesn't say a word. Marco looks at Jean, he's as confused as Marco is. 

"It's the only way out," Bertholdt says, tears streaming down his eyes. 

He looks at Reiner, who gives a resigned nod, then at Annie, who's crying silently. 

"What are you doing?" Marco says, suddenly frightened. 

"Marco, Jean," Bertholdt says, "I'm sorry." 

Marco has time only for taking Jean's hand and running to the door when Bertholdt smashes his head on the wall. There's a deafening explosion and the building comes crashing down on them.

^^^

The first thing Marco sees when he opens his eyes is Jean's bloody face.

"Jean," he tries to shout, but he can't find his voice and his chest hurts so much he wishes he were still unconscious. 

Jean stirs suddenly and looks at Marco. Only then Marco notices that he's buried under rubble and there is a boulder on his stomach. Marco's eyes fill with tears and Jean's mirror his, tears leaving dirty tracks on his cheeks. 

"Hurts so much," he wheezes, "I don't want to die, Marco." 

He's pale and getting paler, and Marco wants to scream and cry and hold his hand and tell him that it's going to be fine, that they will survive, they will get out, but he can't, he can't even take a breath without feeling like there are dozens of knives in his chest. 

"I'm so sorry," Jean whispers, "So sorry I was an ass." 

Marco shakes his head, refusing to accept his apology, refusing to accept his goodbye. 

"No," Jean says, "I..." 

He doesn't finish the phrase. He just moans pitifully, twists once and goes still. 

"No!" Marco screams despite the knives piercing his chest, "Jean, please, no." 

He tries to move, to reach Jean, but everything hurts. He cries and cries until his vision goes black.

^^^

As soon as Marco opens his eyes again, his whole world is engulfed in pain. Hange and Armin look at him worriedly.

"How are you?" Armin asks. 

"Jean?" Marco croaks. 

Armin looks away. "I'm sorry." 

"The Colossal Titan caused an explosion in the dungeon, which killed three soldiers," Hange says, "The prisoners were all blown to pieces." 

Marco closes his eyes and lets the tears fall. Bertholdt... He lied to them, he lied, Marco believed him and now Jean's dead because of that. That's what happens when you show mercy to monsters. They betray you and kill you. 

He wants to scream in rage, but it turns into a coughing fit, which leaves him in such agony that he begs for death. They give him something to ease the pain, but it doesn't help much. 

Marco suffers for three days before finally dying.


	5. Chapter 5

He wakes up with a short cry of pain. 

"Are you alright?" Reiner says. 

"Yeah," Marco croaks, "Go back to sleep, Reiner, just a nightmare." 

"Oh," Reiner says sympathetically. 

Marco hates him and his sympathy with all his heart. 

He waits until Reiner falls asleep, puts a kiss on Jean's lips and sneaks out of the dormitory. He slips into the armory, takes a sword and goes back. 

He takes off Reiner's head in one swift motion, while he's still sleeping. Bertholdt wakes up and tries to scramble away, but it's too late, Marco slashes his throat and then cuts off his head for good measure. He turns back and sees Samuel's horrified face. 

"Marco..." He says, "What-what have you done?" 

"I..." He starts, but is interrupted by Connie's scream. 

"Reiner! Bertholdt!" He shouts, "What happened? Marco, you... did you..." 

Everyone is shouting and crying, but Marco has eyes only for Jean. The other boy is staring at him in shock, his whole body trembling, his face deathly pale. Marco drops the sword and tries to approach him, but Connie and Samuel tackle him and pull his arms behind his back. 

"Why?" Jean whispers. 

"They were going to kill us all," Marco says desperately, "They're titans, Jean, they would kill us all. I did it for us, I did it for all of us." 

"He's gone mad," Connie say, sniffling, "How can they be titans, you murderer?" 

"I haven't!" Marco cries, "They're our enemies, they can turn into titans. Eren can do it too, I'm not mad, please believe me." 

"What?" Eren yells, "Did you say I'm a titan? I'll kill you, you..." 

"What's going on here?" Shadis shouts, kicking the door open, and stops in his tracks, his eyes widening. 

The other instructors soon appear there too and even some of the girls come. Marco notices Annie, her lips trembling and her eyes filled with tears. 

"Not so indifferent anymore, are you, Annie?" He shouts, "This is what you deserve, this is what you should get. You're going to..." 

Shadis punches him on the face and he falls on the cot, smearing his face with Reiner and Bertholdt's blood. 

"Psychopathic son of a bitch," the instructor spits, "Take him away."

^^^

"They're going to execute you," Jean says, "There will be a trial, but there's no way they'll let you live." 

Marco shrugs. At least Reiner and Bertholdt are dead. His only regret is that Annie hasn't joined them yet. 

"Why did you do it?" Jean says, his voice breaking, "What happened to you, Marco? The Marco I know would never do something like that in cold blood." 

Marco touches Jean's face with his fingertips. "I did it for us," he says. 

Jean pushes him away and jumps to his feet. "Stop with that bullshit!" He shouts, "For us? You expect me to believe that, Marco? Even if believed you, you expect me to thank you for killing our friends 'for us'?You're going to die, you understand that? There will be no 'us' after that. There will be just me, alone, without you. Have you thought about that, Marco?" 

"Jean," Marco says, "Please, you have to believe me." 

"I don't have to do anything," Jean yells and storms out of Marco's cell. 

He comes back at night with two bags hanging from his shoulders. 

"We're going to escape," he tells an astonished Marco. 

"Jean, no," Marco says, "If we get caught, they'll punish you too." 

"Then we shouldn't get caught," Jean says, "C'mon, Marco, we have to hurry, I've prepared everything and I stole this from Shadis." 

He takes out a key and unlocks Marco's shackles. 

"Why?" Marco says, rubbing his wrists, "Didn't you think I was mad? Didn't you resent me for killing Reiner and Bertholdt?" 

"I'm doing this for a simple, selfish reason," Jean says, "I don't want to be alone. You're probably the only person who tolerates me." 

Under the guise of the moonless night, they make it to the place the horses are waiting for them, but there is no sign of the animals. 

"How is this possible?" Jean says, "I tied them up here. Someone must have taken them away. But who?" 

"Me," Annie says, suddenly appearing. "I knew you would do something stupid, Jean." 

"Annie, where are the horses?" Jean says indignantly. 

"Who knows?" Annie says, "I suggest you take Marco back to his cell before anyone else notices what you've done." 

"I can't," Jean says stubbornly. 

"Then I'm afraid I have to do it myself." 

She takes out a knife and starts approaching slowly. 

"Marco, run!" Jean cries and jumps in front of Annie. 

She overthrows him easily and charges at Marco, who's been just standing there in shock. After a brief fight, Marco finds himself with the knife pressed to his throat and Annie on top of him. 

"You're scum," Marco spits out hatefully. 

"Yeah," Annie says, "But you're not much better." 

Before Annie can slash his throat, Jean attacks her from behind, trying to grapple the knife out of her hand. Instead Annie slips out of his grip and thrusts the knife into his neck. They both freeze as Jean falls, coughing up blood. Annie's hands are shaking, she tries to reach Jean, but comes to a halt when he stops coughing and goes still. 

"No," Marco shouts, kicking Annie in the stomach, "Jean, no, please, not again." 

He was so close, he got rid of Reiner and Bertholdt only for Annie to ruin everything. 

"I hate you," he screams, reaching for Annie's throat. 

Annie's knife reaches his throat first.


	6. Chapter 6

He wakes up with a gasp. 

"Are you..." 

"Yeah, Reiner, I'm just great, go back to sleep." 

"Nightmare?" Reiner says sympathetically. 

Marco digs his nails into his palms and doesn't respond. 

He knows what went wrong last time. He has to start with Annie. She's smarter than Reiner and Bertholdt, she has to be the first to go, then he'll deal with the guys. 

Slipping into the girls' dormitory is easier than expected. Annie's eyelids twitch only when Marco's already slashed her throat. He cuts off her head and tries to pad back to the door, but there's one factor he's overlooked. 

He doesn't hear her move, but within seconds he's on the floor, the sword is out of his hand and Mikasa is holding him down with her foot on his shoulder. 

"What are you doing here?" She says surprised. 

Krista's scream wakes up all the girls and answers Mikasa's question. To her credit, she doesn't even flinch at the sight of Annie's decapitated body. 

"Why?" She just asks. 

"She's an enemy," Marco says without any hope they will believe him, "She would kill us all. She, Reiner and Bertholdt can turn into titans." 

Mikasa just blinks. The door opens and Hanna comes in, bringing Shadis. 

"What have you done?" He says, hauling Marco up and pushing him to the wall, "You psychopathic son of a bitch." 

Marco remains silent. While Shadis is tying up his hands, the boys enter the dormitory. Marco sees Bertholdt's tall form pushing through the guys with uncharacteristic rudeness. 

"ANNIE!" 

The scream is raw, animalistic, Marco can feel the pain of it on his tongue and he likes the taste. He's familiar with it, he's felt its bitterness every time he saw Jean die. 

Marco looks at Reiner. He's closed his face with a hand and his shoulders are shaking. They are the only two boys who are reacting this strongly. Connie is crying too and Eren looks shell-shocked, but Reiner and Bertholdt's reaction probably seems out of place to the people who don't know their secret. _Yeah, go ahead, blow your cover, idiots,_ Marco thinks bitterly. 

He suddenly realizes that he hasn't seen Jean. Looking around, he notices him a few steps away from the door, knelt on the ground, vomiting. 

Marco's throat tightens. _I'm so sorry, Jean, I'm doing this for us._ He wonders if Jean will help him out this time. If he does, he's not going to run, he's going to kill Reiner and Bertholdt too, no matter what happens. 

He sees Bertholdt only when it's too late. Even Mikasa isn't fast enough to stop him. His eyes full of rage and pain, Bertholdt impales Marco on the same sword that killed Annie.


	7. Chapter 7

He sits up straight, breathing heavily. 

"Yeah, I'm fucking great, Reiner, thanks for asking," he growls without giving the other boy a chance to speak. 

"What's wrong, Marco?" Reiner says confused. 

"Nightmare," Marco sighs. 

He lies back, hoping Reiner will get the hint and shut up. He needs a new plan, but he's sick and tired of his plans failing one by one. 

He looks to the left. Bertholdt is sitting there, hugging his knees, looking lost and innocent, and Marco feels the hatred overwhelm him. 

_Liars, liars and monsters, you don't deserve mercy._

And they won't get any. He knows what was the biggest flaw in his most successful plan so far. He pitied the bastards, he listened to their pleas and it resulted in his most painful death. But this time will be different, this time he won't be fooled. 

He presses his lips to Jean's forehead. "I won't let you die again," he whispers, "I promise."

^^^

He tells Jean right after Trost, even before he tells Armin. He doesn't believe him at first and wonders if Marco's gone mad, but when Armin takes the accusations seriously, Jean starts doubting too.

He volunteers to participate in the capture operation, but thanks to Marco's meddling, he's not allowed to. He sulks a little, but Marco can take it as long as Jean is safe. 

Marco warns Commander Erwin to pay more attention to Annie. "She's very smart and distrusting," he says, "I think she might suspect something." 

It makes the operation even easier than last time. Miche and Nanaba cut her down before she can transform and many lives are saved. 

When Levi and Hange return after the first interrogation, Marco offers his help. Jean looks at him in shock and Marco shrugs. He'll do anything to protect Jean. He'll do everything right this time. 

"Are you sure you can torture the people you once considered friends?" Levi asks bluntly. 

Marco hesitates for a moment, but then remembers Jean's bloody face, remembers the pain, remembers the titan's teeth. 

"Yes," he says. 

When he enters the cell, Reiner immediately perks up. 

"Marco," he says hoarsely, "Marco, you have to tell them to stop hurting Bertholdt. He's in a bad shape. Let him rest a little." 

Marco looks at Bertholdt. He's half-conscious, steam raising all over his body, his arms have grown back up to the elbow. Marco takes out his sword and cuts Bertholdt's arm from the shoulder. The boy moans in pain and goes slack in his chains. 

Marco turns to Reiner. His eyes are wide and his breathing is erratic. He opens his mouth to speak, but no sound comes out. Marco sheaths his sword and leaves. 

"Well?" Hange says when he goes upstairs. 

"I think we should separate them," Marco says, "They're stronger together, they comfort each other. We should keep them in separate cells and bring them together only to make two of them watch how we torture the third one." 

"Hmm, I wanted to keep them together to hear what they might say. What if we understand something from their conversations? Imagine the secrets they know about the titans..." 

"They're not stupid," Marco says, "They won't say anything incriminating. Trust me, I know them, they'll break more easily if they're away from each other." 

Hange considers this for a moment. "You know," she says, "You're pretty different from what your friends say about you." 

"I just want to do the right thing," Marco says. 

"Good," Hange says, "The right thing is usually the hardest to do. I'll follow your advice, Marco. Good job." 

"Thank you," Marco says, blushing. 

It's still too early to celebrate, but Marco has a feeling that this time everything will go great. This time he won't make mistakes and won't let the traitors kill him or Jean.

^^^

"You smell of blood," Jean grumbles, slipping out of Marco's embrace.

"I do? I just bathed." He takes the other boy's hand. "Jean, I missed you." 

Jean curls his hand into a fist. "Sure you did. You've been pretty busy with Hange and Captain Levi." 

Marco sighs. So that's what this is about. He knew they were going to have this conversation sooner or later. "Jean, you know I have to do it," he says. 

"Do you?" Jean says, "I think Hange and Levi can do a pretty good job themselves. Why do you need to help them? How can you even..." 

"Jean, you know who they are, you know what they've done. We need answers." 

"I know!" Jean yells, "But every time I close my eyes, I hear the screams, Marco. I-I've seen what you're doing to them and, honestly, it makes me sick." 

"They've killed thousands of people, they would kill us without hesitation," Marco says desperately. 

"But we're not them, are we? We're not monsters." 

"Sometimes you have to make hard decisions, Jean," Marco says, "Sometimes you have to do the right thing even if it's cruel." 

"To throw aside your humanity to defeat monsters," Jean murmurs. 

"Exactly," Marco says, "You understand it, don't you?" 

"Yeah," Jean says gloomily, "I do."

^^^

It's Annie's turn today. They strap her up to a table. Bertholdt and Reiner are hanging from the ceiling, with hooks going through their flesh.

"Stop it!" Reiner cries, as soon as Levi and Marco approach Annie. 

"I don't remember you stopping before destroying Wall Maria," Levi says calmly. 

"What do you want us to do?" Reiner shouts, "Do you want us to repent? Do you want us to apologize? Will that satisfy you? Fine! We're sorry! We're sorry. Just stop it. Please stop it." 

"That's not what I want," Levi says, "I don't give a shit about your apologies. I want you to talk. Are you going to?" 

"No," Reiner says. 

"Very well. Let's start, Marco." 

Annie doesn't scream for a long time. She squirms and gasps as they cut into her, but she endures. It's only when Marco gets the saw and starts taking apart her ribcage that she lets out a shrill yell. 

She's not the only one. 

"Children of the Devil!" Bertholdt shouts, "I'll kill every last one of you!" 

"No, you won't," Marco says. 

And he doesn't. 

After another day of witnessing Annie being tortured, he breaks, and when Hange asks him how he got his titan power, he tells them the whole story in exchange for Annie's torture to stop. Marco finds it hard to believe that it's possible to turn a human into a titan with the help of titan's spinal fluid, but Hange seems to consider it. 

"We have to test out the theory," Hange tells Erwin when he comes to visit, "We have to inject someone with titan's spinal fluid and see what happens." 

Marco's more concerned about taking Bertholdt out of the picture. He's the most dangerous of them, he's the one who brought down the castle last time. He has to die. 

"And what if it's true?" Erwin says, "We can't have a titan roaming here. We'll have to test out the second part of the theory too." 

"Hmm, we have to sacrifice one of our prisoners, then," Hange says sadly, "A pity, I've gotten used to them." 

"Which one will you miss the least, four-eyes?" Levi says. 

"Commander Erwin," Marco says, "I suggest Bertholdt. If what he says is true, then we'll have the Colossal Titan power. Besides, he's too dangerous, if we're not careful, he might just destroy the whole building." 

"But he's the one who talked first," Levi says, "He might give us more information. Pick one of the other two, Hange." 

"Actually, I think Marco's right," Hange says, "Bertholdt is really too dangerous." 

"We can take that risk to find out their secrets," Erwin says. 

"Commander, the other two will also talk," Marco says, trying to sound confident, "I promise, I'll make them talk." 

"Is that so?" Erwin says, "What do you think, Levi?" 

"They'll crack," Levi says. 

"Fine, then Bertholdt Hoover it is."

^^^

They execute Bertholdt soon after the meeting. After a lot of debates, Armin is chosen to be the person to inherit the Colossal Titan power as a reward for his contribution in identifying the traitors. Besides, he won't be restricted by his physical form on the battlefield.

Bertholdt is unconscious when they bring him out. Annie and Reiner are not, but they are heavily injured. Bringing them out of the dungeon to witness the execution is a risk, but Hange and Levi think that it will help to break them. 

Everyone holds their breaths when Levi injects Armin. In a few seconds there's a titan in Armin's place, bearing a strong resemblance to the blond boy. Bertholdt opens his eyes just when the titan grabs him. 

"No!" He cries, "Someone, help me." 

Annie watches intently, without blinking, how the titan brings Bertholdt to his mouth, while Reiner hides his face against his shoulder and starts shaking with silent sobs. 

"Annie!" Bertholdt shouts desperately, "Reiner! Ann..." 

There's a crunch and moments later Armin comes out of the titan. 

Hange looks like she's going to pass out from happiness. 

"It actually worked," she yells, running to Armin, "I can't believe it. How do you feel, Armin? Oh, looks like he's unconscious. Someone take him to the medical ward." 

She approaches Annie and Reiner. "I know you're sad, but your friend's sacrifice will be remembered for ages," she says, "Now you just _have to_ tell me more. What else do you know about the titans? Where do they come from? Are there other intelligent forms? Why are they so light? Huh, Reiner? Annie? Talk!" 

"Squad Leader, you need to calm down," Moblit says. 

Marco agrees with him. For a second he almost feels bad for Reiner and Annie, but he quickly buries the feeling. _They deserve this._ He turns to Jean to check his reaction, but the other boy has disappeared.

^^^

Reiner's lost in his delusions again. It's been happening more and more often lately and it's getting more difficult to remind him who he is. Marco hates it, hates that he has a place to escape from what he's done, hates him for being a coward and refusing to face the consequences of his actions.

"You're the Armored Titan," Marco tells him, as Levi tries to slice the skin off his face, "Five years ago you destroyed Wall Maria and killed thousands of people. You know that, Reiner." 

"What-what are you talking about, Marco?" Reiner pants, "Why are you doing this? I haven't done anything." 

"What's the point of torturing him in this state?" Annie says suddenly, "He doesn't remember. He can't give you information." 

"What do you mean, Annie?" Reiner says, "What can't I remember? Please tell me, Annie." 

"We'll make him remember," Levi says, pulling off a layer of skin from Reiner's cheek. 

"If I tell you something, will you leave him alone?" Annie says. 

"First tell us, then we'll decide," Levi answers. 

Annie looks him in the eyes. "You've doomed Armin to a premature death. We don't live longer than thirteen years after receiving the powers. It's a curse." 

"You're lying!" Marco shouts. 

Annie smiles sadly. "I'm not. Reiner and I have just six years left. I don't know about Eren, but Armin will die in thirteen years." 

Marco kicks her in the ribs. "Tell me you're lying!" He hisses, "Tell me!" 

"I'm not," Annie says. 

"What are you talking about, Annie?" Reiner says. 

"Don't worry, Reiner," Annie answers, "Nothing important."

^^^

The news about Armin and Eren's lifespan isn't taken lightly, especially by Mikasa. She's convinced Annie's lying, but Marco knows she's telling the truth. Bertholdt tricked him again. But that's fine, Jean is still alive, Marco is still alive and he's going to win the war. Bertholdt's dead now, Reiner and Annie will soon wish they were dead.

When Levi and Hange get called to the capital with Erwin, Marco starts getting anxious. If something goes wrong, they can't do anything without the senior members of the Survey Corps, especially that Miche has taken Eren and Armin to a new safehouse. He spends almost all his time in the dungeons with Annie and Reiner to make sure they're not recovered enough to transform. Even Jean, who's been avoiding the guard duty whenever he could, takes pity on him and offers to look after the prisoners sometimes. But Marco still can't relax. 

The third night after Levi and Hange's departure, Marco's sleep is disturbed by a nightmare of Reiner holding his head underwater. He wakes up, covered in cold sweat, takes a few deep breaths, makes sure Jean is still sleeping next to him, puts on his clothes, takes his weapons and goes down to the dungeon. 

He skips Annie's cell and goes straight to Reiner. The guards let him in without questions. The prisoner is sitting on the ground, chained to the wall, sleeping fitfully, but he immediately wakes up when the cell door opens. He flinches when Marco comes closer. It almost makes Marco laugh. 

_How does it feel, Reiner? How does it feel to be the one who's afraid, to be the one who's hurt? How does it feel to be powerless? Where is your strong will now, Reiner? Your powers can't help you here. You're done. And it was me who did it. Me, the guy you so readily got rid of._

He takes out his sword deliberately slow. Reiner's look follows it, his breathing quickens. Marco thrusts the sword into Reiner's gut. The boy doubles over with pain and lets out a scream from behind gritted teeth. Marco waits for a few seconds and twists the sword. Reiner's scream turns into a sob half-way. 

"Marco, stop it!" 

Marco turns back, startled. Jean's standing there in his nightclothes, his hair tousled, looking devastatingly beautiful and almost as much angry. 

"Why?" Marco says, "He deserves it." 

"Just stop," Jean hisses. 

Marco takes out his sword carelessly. Reiner falls over his knees, shaking. Marco pulls him up by the hair. There's fear and hatred on his tear-stained face and Marco smiles. 

"Talk and this will be over," he lies. 

"Marco, I said stop it," Jean cries, dragging him away. "What the hell is wrong with you?" He growls when they're out of earshot of the guards. 

"Jean, you don't understand..." 

"No, I don't. You're not the Marco I knew, you're not that person. My Marco was the polar opposite of this. He was kind and everyone loved him for that. I loved him for that. Who are you?" 

"Jean, please," Marco says, tears falling down his eyes quicker than he can wipe them. "I'm still Marco. It's still me. I just have to do this. Can't you understand? I have to protect us. You said it yourself, didn't you? You said we have to become monsters to defeat monsters." 

"I can't love a monster," Jean says. 

His voice is quiet, but it breaks Marco to pieces. 

"Jean..." He starts. 

"Go to sleep, Marco," Jean says. 

He goes to the guards, takes a flask of water from them and enters Reiner's cell.

^^^

Marco spends the next day trying to talk to Jean, trying to make him understand, but the other boy doesn't want to listen.

"Are you going to be my Marco again?" He tells him, "Are you going to stop torturing people for fun?" 

He isn't going to. They both know that. The Marco Jean knew is dead. He was betrayed and killed by the people he trusted. He's never coming back. 

The realization hits him suddenly. It's almost more painful than the titan's teeth. He's been lying to himself all along. He's convinced himself that when this is over, he and Jean will be together, happy, and everything will go back to how it used to be. He was as delusional as Reiner. Things can never be back to how they used to be. Not after what he's done, not after what he's become. But that's fine. As long as he can keep Jean safe, everything is fine. Jean can hate and despise him, but they'll both be alive. 

He spends the night crying his eyes out. He doesn't even know what he's crying for – for losing Jean or for losing himself. 

When morning comes, he goes downstairs again. 

It's Annie's day, but as soon as Marco greets the guards, he hears Reiner calling his name. 

"What do you want?" Marco says, coming in and closing the door after him. 

"The other day… you said…" It looks like Reiner puts effort into every word. "You said… this will be over if I talk." 

Marco frowns. "Yeah." 

Reiner just stares at him. 

"Are you going to talk?" Marco says impatiently. 

"Yeah. I-I'll tell you everything." 

Marco sits on a chair in front of him and takes out his sword. Reiner sucks in a breath. 

"Start," Marco says, "But every time I feel like you're lying, I'm going to cut you." 

Reiner gulps. "I won't lie." 

"You'd better not." 

"What do you want to know?" Reiner asks. 

"Why did you destroy the walls?" 

"It was our mission." 

"Who gave you the mission?" 

Silence. Marco cuts Reiner's left arm, which has almost grown back. "Where do you come from?" 

"From-from our hometown." 

"Where is your hometown?" 

"Beyond the Walls." 

Marco cuts his other arm. "Are you kidding me? We already know that! Tell me something I don't know or I'll go ask Annie." 

"No!" Reiner says, "I-I'll tell you something you don't know. Hange... she wanted to know how many... intelligent titans are there, right?" 

"Right," Marco says, "Do you know?" 

"Yeah, there are... there are... nine." 

"Nine intelligent titans?" Marco says, "What powers do they have?" 

"I don't know." 

Marco presses the sword to Reiner's throat. "Are you lying to me?" 

"N-no, there are just legends. Where-where I come from, we have just three of them. We came here to find the others." 

"Did you find them?" 

"Just-just Eren." 

"So are the other intelligent titans inside the Walls?" 

"They're supposed to be here." 

Marco tilts up Reiner's head with the tip of his sword and looks into his eyes. The other boy holds his gaze for a few moments, then looks away. 

"Are you lying?" Marco says. 

Reiner shakes his head. Marco doesn't know if he should believe him. He just gave him more information than they've been able to squeeze out of the prisoners, but something doesn't add up. 

"How do you survive in your hometown?" He asks, "Do you have Walls too?" 

"Yeah," Reiner whispers, "One." 

Marco's eyes widen. Armin will be so happy to hear about this and Hange will lose her mind. Another wall, another part of humanity surviving, nine intelligent titans. He looks down at Reiner with a smile, his heart beating fast from excitement. The other boy stares back warily, he probably hasn't seen Marco smile this way for a long time. 

"What else can you tell me?" Marco says. He's in such a good mood that he doesn't even want to hurt Reiner. 

"I, uh, I don't know." Reiner says, his eyes darting to the cell door. "What do you want me to say?" 

"Why do you call yourselves warriors?" Marco says, remembering the conversation he overheard in the forest. 

"How-how do you know?" Reiner stammers. 

"It doesn't matter. Answer." 

"That's what... our unit is called," Reiner says. 

"Your unit? The titan unit?" 

"Yeah." 

"Who else was in your unit?" 

"Just the three of us." 

Marco sighs and thrusts his sword into Reiner's thigh. "You want me to believe your unit was composed only of three people?" 

"There-there are also the c-candidates who will inherit our powers," the other boy says in a shaking voice. 

"You're lying," Marco says, slashing his other thigh, "Who's Marcel?" 

"What?" Reiner croaks, "How do you... You can't..." 

"Answer the question." 

"He was-he was our friend." 

"Where is he?" 

"He died," Reiner says, blinking the tears away. 

"How did he die?" 

"Saving me from a titan." 

"Did he have titan powers too?" 

Reiner's breathing hard, he looks like he's desperately trying to understand what's the right answer. 

"No," he says finally. 

"Stop lying to me!" Marco cries, jumping up and kicking the chair away. He leans down and grabs Reiner by the jaw. "Did you make it all up? Tell me the whole truth or you'll regret the day you were born, Reiner." 

The boy looks at the door and back at Marco and stays silent. 

"Why are you looking there?" Marco says, "No one's coming to save you." 

The corner of Reiner's mouth curls up. Marco plops down on the ground in shock. 

"No," he says, "No." 

He slashes Reiner's chest and jumps up to his feet. "Someone check on Annie!" He shouts. 

He immediately realizes that it's a bad idea, but it's too late. If Annie transforms, they're all dead. He curses Annie, curses Reiner, but most of all curses himself for falling into yet another trap, for letting his problems with Jean cloud his judgment and make him forget about checking on Annie for almost a whole day. 

He reaches Annie's cell right when the guards open it, fully prepared to face her titan. But it isn't there. Instead there is Annie, still in her human form, but encased in crystal-like substance. When the initial shock wears off, the guards try to break it, but Marco feels it in his gut it's hopeless. What is he going to tell Hange and Levi when they come back? What is he going to tell Commander Erwin? 

"Why didn't you cut her limbs?" He yells. 

"Why didn't you?" The Garrison guard answers, "It was your job. You always did it." 

The guards keep fussing with the crystal, but Marco turns back and goes to Reiner's cell. He's unconscious, but Marco's kick wakes him up. 

"Marco," he says, "I don't know what you guys think I've done, but it's not true. I swear I'm no traitor. You have to believe me. Just ask Bertholdt." 

"Bertholdt is dead," Marco says, gritting his teeth at Reiner's shocked and pained expression, "You're the Armored Titan. You're a murderer, a traitor and a liar and you're going to pay for all your crimes." 

He takes out his knife and kneels in front of the prisoner. When he's done with him, Reiner's face is unrecognizable, similar more to a bloody skull than to a human head, but Marco hasn't found out how to get Annie out of the crystal. Reiner cried while he had eyes and begged while he had lips and a tongue, but he didn't tell. 

Marco stands up and looks at his creation. The boy who once was the Armored Titan cowers before him, making sounds that are not human anymore. 

Marco bends down in a corner and throws up.

^^^

He meets Jean on his way upstairs. The other boy glances at Marco's hands still covered in smoking blood and walks away. Marco wants to call him back, to beg him not to enter Reiner's cell, but he doesn't. Jean already knows he's a monster, this isn't going to change anything.

He can't get Reiner's ravaged face out of his mind and it makes him nauseous again. He goes to the dormitory and opens a window to breathe fresh air. Then he lies down on his bed and falls into a restless sleep. 

Sounds of gunshots wake him up. He sits up, rubbing his eyes, thinking it was just another nightmare, but a bullet wheezing above his head wakes him up completely. 

"We're under attack!" Someone shouts in the corridor, "The Military Police attacking!" 

Marco gets on the ground and crawls to the corridor. The few Garrison soldiers that are in the castle are running to the windows. One of them throws Marco a rifle. 

_Jean, I have to find Jean._ But there is no time, the Military Police is already in the castle and they have to run to the forest. Mikasa leads them out, slashing MPs left and right. Thanks to her, Marco and a few Garrison members are able to get out unharmed. But Jean isn't there, Marco can't see him anywhere, he just keeps shooting and running. They manage to run for a couple of hours until they are surrounded. 

"Tell us where the titan is and we'll let you live," a police member commands. 

Mikasa glares at everyone. If anyone talks, she'll kill them sooner than the MPs, that much is clear. No one can talk even if they wanted. They don't know where Eren and Armin are. 

"Are you ready to throw away your lives for a titan?" The same MP shouts. 

"Are _you_?" A calm voice comes. 

The MPs look around. 

"You're surrounded," Captain Levi continues, "And you know you don't stand a chance against me." 

The MPs apparently don't know that, because they try to attack and Squad Levi and Squad Hange easily defeat them, killing most of them and taking two prisoners. When they return to the castle Marco starts searching for Jean frantically, but he isn't there – neither alive, nor dead. He goes to the dungeon and meets Levi on the way. 

"The Armored Titan has escaped," Levi says, "And the Female Titan is in some kind of crystal. What the hell happened here?" 

"What?" Marco shouts, "Impossible, he was in no state to escape." 

"Well, he isn't here and the shackles are broken. Either he escaped, or someone took him." 

Marco freezes. _Jean wouldn't._

"It must have been the MPs," he says, "They've taken Reiner and Jean." 

"C'mon, we're going to look for them," Levi says, "We have to find him before he recovers and transforms."

^^^

Captain Levi hasn't come bearing good news. Commander Erwin is arrested and the Survey Corps will most likely be disbanded. Hange and Moblit are gone to take care of some secret business and they have to leave the castle before the MPs come with new forces.

Levi decides that Squad Hange together with Mikasa will accompany the captured MPs and Annie to a new safehouse, while the rest of them will go in search of Reiner. 

"We can't let the Military Police get their hands on Eren or Reiner," he says, "We have to find him at any cost." 

He doesn't mention Jean. Marco doesn't want to think about the reasons. Jean can't be dead. Marco knows it. If he's dead, then all this was in vain. 

They split in two groups. One heads out to Wall Sina, the other one goes to the forest in case the MPs have decided to hide there. 

Levi sends Marco with the forest group much to his chagrin. They wander till evening, but with no success. They set up a camp in the forest with the intention of continuing their search in the morning. Marco would much rather join Levi's group to help them with the MPs, but Eld, who's leading their group, decides otherwise. 

Just as they're about to sleep, they hear Gunther whistle. He's been placed as a guard and the whistle means that he's seen something. 

Gunther raises two fingers and points to the west. Eld gestures to the group to form a circle around the suspicious area. They decide to proceed on foot for the start. Using ODM gears in this thick forest, especially with the moon behind the clouds isn't safe. According to Gunther, the suspects weren't wearing gears either. 

The circle slowly enlarges and soon Marco finds himself away from his teammates. He grips his rifle tighter. It's probably nothing more than poachers who got scared when they saw soldiers, but Marco's heart is still beating faster than usual. 

He is moving without making a sound, that's why he hears the twigs breaking under what seems like footsteps. Marco turns to the direction the noise came from. The moon comes out from behind the clouds for a moment and he sees a silhouette slipping through the trees. His blond hair shine in the moonlight. 

_Reiner._ Marco shoots a signal flare. Reiner drops all pretenses and starts running. Marco follows him. He knows he can't take Reiner alone, but he can stall him until the others reach them. Besides, he might still be weak. He's not running very fast, even Marco can reach him, especially if he uses his gear. But that won't be wise, if Marco reaches him sooner than the help arrives, Reiner can overpower him. Marco thinks of shooting him, but he's afraid of triggering a transformation. 

Suddenly he realizes that he can hear a third pair of footsteps, besides his and Reiner's. He hopes it's someone from their group, but what if it's not? If it's not a friend, then Marco's clearly outnumbered. Who else can it be? Annie? She might have broken out of the crystal. Or is it... 

The unknown person comes into his line of sight, his hood over his head, the unicorn emblem proudly displayed on his back. _Fucking Military Police._ Are they so desperate for power that they want to use the Armored Titan, one of the biggest enemies of humanity? 

Marco stops the chase and takes aim. It's dark and the target is moving, but Marco's always been a good marksman. 

The gunshot echoes in the forest. The MP staggers and falls, gurgling up blood. Reiner comes to a sudden halt. 

The moon is out now and Marco can see the horror on Reiner's face, can see the exact moment he realizes what just happened and can see his lips form a single word. 

"Jean!" 

There is nothing else in the world except Marco's heartbeat and the fallen body. Marco doesn't remember how he reaches it. One moment he's at a shooting distance from it and the other he's standing right over it and Reiner, who's trying to stop the gushing blood. He remembers only that on his way here he was calm, that he was convinced Reiner is lying, that it can't be true, it can't be Jean. 

But it is him. It's Jean's body, it's Jean's blood trickling out of Jean's mouth, it's Jean's lifeless eyes staring into nothingness. 

Marco's knees give way, but Reiner doesn't let him fall. He jumps to his feet and with a snarl pins Marco to a nearby tree. He's got a knife in his hand. Somewhere far away in Marco's mind there's a weak thought that he must have weapons too, but he doesn't care enough to check. 

He looks at Reiner and is surprised to discover that he can't see him through the veil of tears. He blinks them away and Reiner comes into focus. The wounds on his face are gone and he's just like the Reiner Marco got to know during training, but his eyes look like they belong to an old man, who's lived much longer than he wanted. 

"You're a real piece of shit, Marco, you know that?" Reiner says. 

Marco looks into his old man's eyes, looks at Jean's blood drying on his hands. 

"Yeah," he says, "I know." 

"Die," Reiner says and thrusts the knife into Marco's heart.


	8. Chapter 8

He opens his eyes calmly. Reiner doesn't wake up this time. Everyone is sleeping. Everyone is alive. Jean is snoring next to him, still breathing, still warm, still Marco's. 

He touches his cheek with a shaking hand. Jean frowns and opens his eyes. 

"Your hands are cold," he mutters. 

"I'm sorry," Marco says, "I'm so sorry." 

Jean gives him a puzzled look. "Why are you awake?" 

"I love you," Marco says. 

Jean grins. "Is that what keeps you awake at nights?" 

"I love you," Marco repeats, "I love you more than anything. Please stay alive." 

"Marco, are you alright?" Jean says concerned. 

"Yeah," Marco lies, "I'm fine." 

"Then let me sleep," Jean grumbles. 

"Sorry." 

"Hey, Marco?" 

"Yeah." 

"I love you too." 

Jean snuggles closer to Marco and closes his eyes. Marco wraps his arms around him. On their left Bertholdt is awake, sitting on his cot with his back to the wall, hugging his knees, smiling sadly. Marco looks away.

^^^

He tries so hard to be the person he used to be. He smiles kindly, he offers good advice, he helps the others with whatever he can. He fools everyone but himself.

The mask he's wearing never cracks, but he still feels its weight. Underneath the façade of the kind boy he pretends to be, he's the rotten shell of a person who can kill and torture with no hesitation. He hates that person. He doesn't want to be that person. He doesn't want to feel the surge of hatred, guilt and pity every time he looks at Reiner, Bertholdt or Annie. He doesn't want to dream about Annie's broken ribcage, Bertholdt's crushed body, Reiner's mutilated face. He doesn't want to see Jean die, doesn't want to be the reason of his death. He wants to enjoy his remaining days with Jean without anything poisoning them. 

It's impossible with three titans wandering around, sleeping under the same roof and pretending to be their friends, but it's better than what he had after he came back from the dead. When he's with Jean, he can almost believe that he's still a good person, can almost believe he'll have his happy ending. 

There is no such thing for him, though, he knows it. People like him don't have happy endings.

^^^

When the day comes and they are ordered to bait the titans and help Eren seal the gate, Marco hugs Jean and doesn't let him go for a long time.

Jean looks at him with a grave expression on his face, still shaken by the death of so many friends. 

"Try to stay alive," he says. 

"I will," Marco lies, "You don't die either, Jean, please." 

"I won't," Jean promises. 

Marco believes him. 

He does everything he's supposed to do. Tries to lure the titans away from Eren, encourages those who've lost hope, fights to the best of his abilities. When the time comes, Marco flies away. 

He's afraid he won't find it, but turns out he remembers the place all too clearly. Bertholdt and Reiner are standing over the same house, talking. They haven't noticed Marco yet. There is no one else around except the titans. 

Marco takes a deep breath and lands on the roof.


End file.
